Movie Review: MAMA
Director: Andrés Muschietti
What do you get when you take the guy who plays Jaime Lannister, the guy who plays Monk, Jessica Chastain’s ample and bouncy perfect tits and a psycho-bitch ghost? Well you get an engaging ghost story that offers some really interesting visuals…and Jessica Chastain’s awesome tits bouncing around. Also we learn women are just as crazy in death as they were in life.
‘Mama’ centers around two little girls who were kidnapped by their father, then left in the wilderness for five years lost who are later discovered by some trackers the girls’ uncle Luke(Jamie Lannister) hired to find them. The girls were originally ages 5 and 1 when they went missing and as the story unfolds we begin to find out more of how the girls survived and lived. Apparently there was a spirit that the girls called Mama to help raise them, in some fashion. When found, the girls are in pretty horrible condition and walk in strange ways. Victoria, the oldest, can still remember to talk but Lilly has a little bit more of an issue adapting to normal living conditions. This aspect of the film is one of the more interesting parts, showing how children left alone might learn to walk and interact with people once they come back into contact with humans. Also a jealous ghost follows them home just to spice things up a bit.
The little girl who portrays Lilly does such a wonderful job with her role that she really sells the idea of the child being left without any human contact for 5 years. From the way she ‘walks’ to how she has trouble speaking and just her actions all are a testament to the girls acting ability.
When the girls are discovered, custody of them are handed over to their fathers brother Luke on the condition the psychiatric doctor gets to continue to study the girls. Part of the bargain is that Luke and Jessica Chastain’s tits get to live in a new house to help raise the girls. As the story unfolds, Monk begins to find out more of the backstory of what happened to the girls and Jessica Chastain’s character is a borderline shitty bitch(with nice tits) person but one that wants to try to do the right thing and does some growing up during the movie…meanwhile Jamie Lannister falls down stairs, sits in a hospital bed and has dreams and seizures. Also there is a ghost that likes moths and hiding in closets.
I found ‘Mama’ actually a pretty interesting modern day ghost story. It has engaging characters with the two little girls and Chastain’s character…what’s her name…Annabelle…I found dislikable a first but someone who found herself trying to do the right thing which was admirable. Also I liked the idea of the girls’ psychiatric doctor(Monk) piecing together the mystery of what was happening.
Alas, however there were a few problems I had with the movie. The psychiatric doctor unraveling the mystery kind of went nowhere and the character ended up being wasted at the expense of him just being used to kind of tell us, as a viewer, what was going on…though his information did fall into the families hands indirectly but I felt this was kind of the wrong way of using the character and moving the plot ahead. Also, Jaime Lannister was kind of underused in my opinion.
Overall though I thought the story and movie of ‘Mama’ was and engaging movie and kept me interested. The visuals are bizarre enough to keep you kind of mesmerized to the screen without being gory. The acting is solid, especially from the little girl who played Lilly, and Jessica Chastain’s tits are pretty fantastic in this movie…too bad we don’t get to see them without clothing. Also there is a crazy bitch ghost…with no tits.
CORRECTION: (I just found out the guy who was the psychiatric doctor was not the guy who played Monk…well they look a like and I’m not going back and changing this shit)